Kingdavid C. Ofunne
@AjeboWriter · Lagos, Nigeria · joined 27 Jun 2016
Multi-Talented Writer | Storyteller | Skit Writer…. Believe my stories at your own RISK | DM for ads and promotions!
53 668Followers
375Following
13 014Posts total
53.4MViews on collected posts
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Be honest.
If someone you liked served you struggling jollof on the first date, would you:
Tell them the truth?
Eat it politely?
Or order suya on your way home? 👇
319 views · 5 likes
· 1 reposts · 1 replies
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That night, I did not end the talking stage.
But I learnt that attraction can survive many things.
Jollof disappointment is not one of them.
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I tried to rescue the evening.
I added stew. Added pepper. Even threw fried plantain on the side.
The rice still refused to become jollof.
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· 0 reposts · 1 replies
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She took one bite from my plate and immediately understood.
“You don’t like it.”
I said, “I didn’t say that.”
She said, “You are chewing like a man about to puke.”
No! I was actually trying to survive the jollof rice!
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· 0 reposts · 1 replies
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She smiled.
“Different how?”
I looked at the plate. I looked at her. I remembered the wine I brought.
“It has potential.”
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She leaned forward.
“So?”
I said, “It’s different.”
This is the most dangerous sentence a Nigerian man can say about food.
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I tasted it.
The rice was soggy. The pepper was shy. The salt was confused.
Every grain tasted like it had been cooked separately and introduced later.
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She saw my face.
“Don’t judge it by appearance. My jollof is very nice.”
I said I wasn’t judging.
My eyes were simply reporting.
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The rice was pale orange.
Not jollof orange.
It was the colour of somebody who had heard about tomatoes but never met one.
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Then she served the jollof.
That was when the relationship entered its first trial.
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When I entered, she was in the kitchen.
The food was cooking. Everywhere smelled nice.
I relaxed.
Maybe this relationship had a future.
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I dressed well, bought red wine and chocolate for dessert, sprayed perfume and arrived early.
I wanted her to know I was serious.
Maybe too serious…
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She said, “Come hungry.”
Those two words can make a man cancel every other plan.
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We had been talking for a while.
She told me she makes the best jollof in her family.
Not “I can cook.”
The best.
There is a difference.
650 views · 4 likes
· 0 reposts · 1 replies
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I went to a babe’s house for a jollof date last weekend.
I thought I was going there to impress her.
I did not know I was going to defend myself from a plate of jollof rice.
A thread 🧵
14K views · 32 likes
· 5 reposts · 2 replies
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My son is starting school this September, my wife and I decided to go and look around for schools we’ll register him once enrollment starts
We entered the first school, it’s big and spacious. They have a boarding school inside in one part and then the preschool in another…
7.4K views · 60 likes
· 7 reposts · 8 replies
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My wife’s friend had never sat well with me.
I couldn’t even explain exactly what it was. Maybe it was the way she carried herself. Maybe it was the kind of life she lived. She partied a lot, went clubbing, drank, smoked, and seemed to have very few boundaries…
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· 5 reposts · 3 replies
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My wife has a very serious problem.
She likes looking good.
Now, before you people start coming for me, there is nothing wrong with looking good. In fact, I like that my wife looks good.
The problem is the time. This woman can spend eternity on her eyes, mouth, and hair…
4.7K views · 29 likes
· 3 reposts · 3 replies
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Careful what you start tonight.
You might not sleep.
If you love plot twists that make you drop your phone and endings that hit different…
My book, The Hunt, is exactly that kind of story.
Get your copy now:
https://t.co/OvLxOf2kKR
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@AjeboWriter While your intentions might be good, having a 7-year-old girl spend time at your place raises serious concerns. A child that young doing chores for you is not just unusual—it’s highly inappropriate. I have a daughter that age, and if I ever found out she was spending
457.3K views · 2.6K likes
· 51 reposts · 81 replies
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Have you read the trending story everyone’s talking about? Catch up on other previous threads too…
👇🏿 👇🏿 👇🏿 👇🏿
https://t.co/X5cJDG3k66
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To think that she was safer with me than her own gender was a truth too bitter to swallow.
The End
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· 180 reposts · 36 replies
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When the mom went to confront her, she caught Margaret red-handed, nak3d, ontop Ada. That’s how she screamed and alerted the neighbors
Tears started dropping from my eyes because I had genuinely grown fond of Ada…
1.3M views · 9.8K likes
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I couldn’t breathe.
Apparently, one of her victims got angry that Margaret chased her away because she was busy with Ada and went to report to her mum, confessing everything the aunty has been doing to her…
1.4M views · 9.2K likes
· 67 reposts · 3 replies
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Curious, I asked another neighbor what had happened.
“Margaret has been arrested,”
“Arrested ke? For what?” I asked, shocked
He looked left & right then lowered his voice & said “Omo, she be lezbo & she deh knack all the small small girls for area even that ur small friend.”
1.5M views · 9.6K likes
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Instead, she started spending her day at Margaret’s house. I watched her from a distance, coming & going every day without even looking in my direction. (by Ajebo Writer) I felt bad but there was nothing I could do
Yesterday I came back late from work & I saw police everywhere.
1.4M views · 9K likes
· 65 reposts · 2 replies
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It was Ada, holding a half-eaten biscuit and waiting to enter. I hid and didn’t answer. The next thing, her mother appeared out of nowhere, dragging her back.
I could hear the sounds of her flogging her daughter and her screams. That was the last time Ada came to my house…
1.5M views · 9.8K likes
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I was too shocked to make any sound as I sat frozen in my bed. Me? Dangerous? How could anyone think that of me? I couldn’t bring myself to step outside that day. The shame was too much
The next day, I heard a soft knock on my door...
1.6M views · 10K likes
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Chinyere, to her credit, defended me. “Ada likes him. He’s kind to her, and I’ve never heard her complain about anything.”
But Margaret wasn’t convinced. “It’s better you keep your daughter away before something happens. (Story by Ajebo Writer) These men, they can be dangerous.”
1.6M views · 11K likes
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Face aux comptes de taille comparable
19 posts des 90 derniers jours, à côté de la tranche de 10K–100K abonnés. touche moins de monde que les comptes de taille comparable.
Vues médianes337ce compte940médiane pour 10K–100K
Portée, %0.63%ce compte3.45%médiane pour 10K–100K
Engagement, %1.41%ce compte1.55%médiane pour 10K–100K
| Indicateur | Ce compte | Médiane pour 10K–100K | Rapport |
|---|---|---|---|
| Vues médianes par post | 337 | 940 | 0.36× |
| Portée (vues ÷ abonnés) | 0.63% | 3.45% | 0.18× |
| Taux d'engagement | 1.41% | 1.55% | 0.91× |
Autres comptes de cette tranche → Comparer avec un autre compte → Comment ces repères sont établis →
Growth & engagement
How the posts we collected actually performed: views and reaction rate post by post, what the audience did with them, and where the follower count goes.
Views per post
52115 Sep
396
358
355
337
331
326
313
312
306
299
320
319
269
Last 14 collected posts, oldest on the left. The scale is logarithmic: one post can outrun the rest a hundred times over.
Engagement rate per post
1.15%15 Sep
1.26%
1.40%
1.41%
1.48%
1.51%
2.15%
2.24%
2.24%
2.29%
2.01%
1.88%
2.19%
0.00%
Reactions — likes, reposts, replies and quotes — divided by views. Median for 10K–100K accounts is 1.55%.
What the audience does
Likes96.8%85 831 in total
Reposts0.9%823 in total
Replies0.2%191 in total
Quotes0.3%277 in total
Bookmarks1.7%1 527 in total
Share of every reaction we collected for this account. Replies mean argument, reposts mean endorsement, bookmarks mean the post was worth keeping.
The follower curve appears once this account has two daily snapshots — we take one a day, and this one is on its first.
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